The primary insight in this book is to understand and respect the stress-recovery cycle in all life domains. Most of us find this a naturally intuitive concept in domains like weightlifting and fitness, but the authors illustrate similar cycles of stress-recovery in practically every other life domain as well: in our relationships, in our cognition, even in our spiritual life.
Thus the key to "full engagement" doesn't come from perfecting your time management skills or from forcing yourself to work harder. It comes from working with and managing the natural energy cycles of our bodies. You can't go 100% hard-driving all the time, but at the same time you also can't be lazy. Instead, work at an appropriately challenging level of intensity, then dial things back and recover, thinking of your metaphorical "muscles" in cognitive, emotional and relationship domains just like you'd think about your literal muscles when you're training. Challenge followed by recovery equals a stronger, more robust system. Respect the cycle.
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A second insight--the most important of the three insights I'll share in this review--is the strategic use of rituals and habits. "Since will and discipline are far more limited and precious resources than most of us realize, they must be called upon very selectively." Habits, however--once established--don't use up precious willpower, discipline or even decision-making bandwidth. They hardly require conscious thought at all! Any goal can be broken down into various habits that move you toward that goal; thus figure out which habits to employ and make those habits habitual. This is a superpower to accomplish all kinds of things with surprisingly little day-to-day effort. [See all James Clear's book Atomic Habits for more on this notion.]
A third insight (which the authors don't discuss directly, but is rather a second-order insight derived from the book): build in a certain amount of optionality into your daily, weekly and monthly schedule. The concept of optionality gets you thinking about ways to leave open space and flexibility in your life, so you can use your energy when you have it rather than forcing yourself to do things when you don't. Forcing yourself to do high-cognition work when you're feeling foggy will only amount to half-assed results plus increased frustration. Use your energy when it's there. This insight put you on a strategy level: it gets you thinking about the design of your day-to-day life, as you work with your body's signals and cycles of energy, cognition, and other capacities.
As I age--and experience the unfortunate "bad day" here and there, when my body or mind won't cooperate with me like it used to--I suspect the ability to employ optionality will only grow in importance.
It goes without saying that the system--the plantation, W-2 hell, whatever you want to call it--doesn't want you to have optionality. It doesn't want you functioning at "full engagement." On the contrary: it wants you overscheduled, tired, drugged, unresisting, indebted, anxious, frustrated, and most of all, disempowered. Do not let them beat you.
Finally, co-author Jim Loehr is also the author of the incredibly useful book Mental Toughness Training for Sports. This author has been so helpful to me across that book and this one that it's clearly worth delving into more of his works.
Other works by Jim Loehr:
Mental Toughness Training for Sports [review here]
Breathe In Breathe Out
Toughness Training for Life
Toughness Training for Life
Stress for Success
[Readers, what follows are my notes and reactions to the book--they are here to help me order my thinking and better remember what I read. Feel free to stop here, but also feel free to skim the bolded parts.]
Notes:
Part 1: the Dynamics of Full Engagement
Chapter 1: Fully Engaged: Energy, Not Time, Is Our Most Precious Resource
3ff Comments here on the rushed modern era, celebrating "breadth rather than depth," causing us to rush, do too much, and then engage in expedient behaviors like sleeping less, eating on the run. "Energy, not time, is the fundamental currency of high performance... Without the right quantity, quality, focus and force of energy, we are compromised in any activity we undertake." "Every one of our thoughts, emotions and behaviors has an energy consequence, for better or for worse.
5 The central premise of the book: "Performance, health and happiness are grounded in the skillful management of energy." On leaders as the "stewards of organizational energy" who inspire (or demoralize) others by how they manage their own energy and how they mobilize the energies of those they lead. "The skillful management of energy, individually and organizationally, makes possible something that we call full engagement."
6 See photo for the old time management paradigm with no downtime and self discipline as the underlying driver versus the new paradigm that's less dependent on discipline and more ritual and habit-based. Also note the comments here about a large percent of workers at their jobs are actively disengaged. [Which is likely why employers are doing their best to replace their workers with software or machines...]
6 Also comments on how to squander and misuse your energy via poor eating habits, insufficient regular recovery and renewal, negative emotions, being unfocused.
7 On the authors initial clients who were mostly tennis players: citing Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario and Gabriella Sabatini, who turned around their careers, see also Sergi Bruguera [quick highlights of him beating Jim Courier in the 1993 French Open final] along with a long list of other athletes; "...we spend no time focusing on their technical or tactical skills... We focused instead on helping them to manage their energy more effectively in the service of whatever mission they were on."
8ff A compare and contrast here of athlete clients versus corporate clients: the athletes typically had off-seasons to rest, recuperate and grow, they had precise routines for managing energy and most of their time was spent training; by contrast corporate "athletes" (the authors' phrase) don't really get and off-season, just a couple of weeks of vacation a year, which isn't usually fully rest and recovery; also athletes have a career span usually a 5 to 7 years whereas in corporate life you're expected to work for most of your life without much in terms of breaks.
9ff Four key energy management principles:
Principle 1: full engagement requires drawing on four separate but related sources of energy: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.
9ff On energy being measured in terms of quantity (low to high) and emotional capacity in terms of quality (negative to positive); on high positive energy: being invigorated, confident, challenged, joyful, connected.
Principal 2: Because energy capacity diminishes both with overuse and with underuse, we must balance energy expenditure with intermittent energy renewal.
11 Note the text box here talking about parallels between physical capacity and mental capacity; talking about mental endurance, mental flexibility, emotional resilience, emotional flexibility, mental endurance (focus and concentration) and spiritual strength, all with analogs in the physical domain.
12 Comments here on recovery: renewing and expanding our energy reserves, both on an individual and organizational level. The idea of disengaging periodically to seek renewal rather than living life as an endless marathon; another useful analogy here of living life as a sprinter rather than a marathoner, where there's a finish line that's clearly visible; we "must learn to live our lives as a series of sprints, fully engaging for periods of time, and then fully disengaging and seeking renewal before jumping back into the fray to face whatever challenges confront us."
Principal 3: To build capacity, we must push beyond our normal limits, training in the same systematic way that elite athletes do.
13 On stress plus recovery: applying the concept to our muscles (obviously), but also to other life dimensions like empathy, patience, creativity, integrity, exposing yourself to stress in these domains beyond typical/ordinary demands, followed by recovery. Also comments here on not backing off at the slightest hand of discomfort, and reframing "stress that prompts discomfort" as something that can expand our capacity--as long as there's adequate recovery afterward.
Principal 4: Positive energy rituals--highly specific routines for managing energy--are the key to full engagement and sustained high performance.
14ff "We are creatures of habit. Most of what we do is automatic and nonconscious." On the limits to using will and discipline versus building rituals: highly structured behaviors that become habitual, like brushing your teeth, something you [hopefully!] don't have to remind yourself to do. "The power of rituals is that they insure that we use as little conscious energy as possible where it is not absolutely necessary, leaving us free to strategically focus the energy available to us in creative, enriching ways."
15ff On the authors' process of purpose-truth-action: Step 1 is Define Purpose: how should I spend my energy in a way that is consistent with my deepest values? Step 2 is Face the Truth: how are you spending your energy now? "We regularly underestimate the consequences of our energy management choices." See also the authors' website poweroffullengagement.com for their full engagement inventory. Step 3 is Take Action: building a plan grounded in positive energy rituals.
Review:
* Maintaining energy, not time, is the fundamental currency of high performance. Performance is grounded in the skillful management of energy.
* Great leaders are stewards of organizational energy. They begin by effectively managing their own energy. As leaders, they must mobilize, focus, invest, channel, renew and expand the energy of others.
* Full engagement is the energy state that best serves performance.
Principle 1: full engagement requires drawing on four separate but related sources of energy: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.
Principle 2: because energy diminishes both with overuse and with underuse, you must balance energy expenditure with intermittent energy renewal.
Principle 3: To build capacity we must push beyond our normal limits, training in the same systematic way that elite athletes do.
Principle 4: Positive energy rituals--highly specific routines for managing energy--are the key to full engagement and sustained high performance.
Making change that lasts requires a three-step process: Define Purpose, Face the Truth, and Take Action.
Chapter 2: The Disengaged Life of Roger B.
20ff An anonymized client is experiencing low energy, impatience, negativity, lack of passion, his work performance was declining, etc., and he comes to see the authors at their training facility. [Some useful money quotes follow here]: "...if you aren't doing the sort of regular cardiovascular and strength training recommended in chapter 3 [the next chapter], you are almost certainly progressively losing energy capacity." "All performance barriers, we have found, are attributable to poor energy management--either in the form of insufficient energy renewal, insufficient energy capacity or, or typically, both."
This Roget B. guy really let his physique slip, he had 27% body fat, he develops a gut, etc., the authors walk through his heavily carb-based diet; he would eat dinner late in the evening, he barely exercised ("he couldn't find the time"), he's ground down by his commute, he's drinking a little more than he should every night, he's not sleeping well or going to bed at a reasonable hour, etc. [Basically this guy is doing all the stuff you can mostly get away with in your 20s and early 30s, which is stuff you increasingly cannot get away with in your late 30s and 40s... and it's stuff you can't get away with at all in your 50s. Also quite striking here that there's absolutely no discussion of intermittent fasting and autophagy! Unfortunately these guys belong to the "breakfast is the most important meal of the day" school of dietary "science."]
23ff Roger B. is also experiencing impatience and negativity on the emotional level: in his younger years was the sort of guy who was easy going and a great guy to be around, but over time, and with the setbacks he began experiencing in life, he's become sarcastic and harsh; his relationship with his wife deteriorates, their conversations were all about household logistics and "negotiating" who was going to pick up the kids or the dry cleaning.
25ff He's not setting proper boundaries with his work: he's checking email all the time, allowing his ability to concentrate to be sacrificed by things like email and short-term urgent tasks; he's reacting to external demands rather than properly setting out his own tasks and organizing his own time. [Stephen Covey would say he is not in Quadrant II.]
Chapter 3: The Pulse of High Performance: Balancing Stress and Recovery
28ff On the concept of periodization; work followed by rest, stress followed by recovery; also on applying periodization to all domains: the physical, the emotional, the mental and the spiritual. "We are oscillatory beings in an oscillatory universe." On the contrast between oscillation and linearity, "linearity ultimately leads to dysfunction and death." [Great conceptual frameworks here!]
31ff On "ultradian" rhythms that occur inside circadian rhythms, for example in a typical sleep we have ultradian cycles of 90 to 120 minutes; also there is a natural ebb and flow of our energy as well as other physiological measures over the course of our waking cycle, see for example hunger pangs, difficulty concentrating, an inclination to procrastinate or a higher incidence of mistakes that may occur when we've been working at something for too long. Thus we tend to turn to things like coffee, marijuana or alcohol to mask linearity in our lives, either to help us get to sleep, or to compensate for poor sleep, or to keep us concentrating on a task.
32ff On Jim Loehr and his work with tennis players and other athletes: comments on properly using the time between points, the various routines players use, how a player holds his head and shoulders; on maximizing recovery during these periods; basically setting up highly structured, highly efficient and focused recovery routines. See also Jack Nick discussing how he would oscillate between relaxation and intense focus over the course of a round of gold.
36 On the idea of creating a "between-point ritual" in your work day, for your organization, or in your cognitive work; scheduling intermittent recovery. See the example of an executive who would walk up and down a dozen flights of stairs--and also would practice juggling!--for mental "breaks" during the day.
37 Returning to Roger B. from Chapter 2: he was unaware of it, but living a highly linear life; he was overtraining mentally and emotionally and undertraining physically and spiritually, thus losing endurance, strength, resilience, and growing disconnected from his values or any sense of purpose. [Worth mentioning a couple of nuances here: first that the author mention that his default actions here were "socially sanctioned" because we live in a world that celebrates work/activity; further that the man himself was unable to perceive these patterns in his life. This gives us two possible heuristics: 1) do the opposite of what the work world "wants" you to do, and 2) pay more attention! The plantation wants you weak, ignorant, not seeing things properly, distracting yourself, it wants you tired, disconnected. Do the opposite!]
38 "Many of us treat life as a marathon that doesn't end until it finally ends for good."
38 On the four "energy quadrants":
40ff Comments here on workaholism; also on "karoshi," the Japanese term for death from overwork; also Basedow's disease, which shows up in athletes who overtrain.
43ff On increasing your output with stress followed by recovery; by systematically exposing ourselves to more stress through each stress/recovery cycle to prompt "supercompensation," just like in muscle development. Note the comment here about how when we're on low on energy, or low on security, or self-esteem, or emotional resilience, when we feel threatened or just unwilling to expose ourselves to more discomfort, we retreat to self protection. The authors refer to this as "defense spending." "Accurately assessing the level of threat in our lives is critical if we are to continue to grow rather than forever defending what we have." [This is another interesting way to think about it. You want to live your life on offense, in Quadrant II; you do not want to be in defense spending mode.]
46 Back to Roger B, again, where the authors say that he lacks sufficient capacity because he hadn't exposed himself to sufficient stress. But the stress had to be accompanied with recovery, and his life had no space at all for recovery, thus he was facing "diminished capacity in the face of rising demand."
Review:
* On the need to spend and recover energy, the concept of oscillation and stress/recovery.
* The opposite of oscillation is linearity, too much energy expenditure without recovery, or the opposite: too much recovery without sufficient energy expenditure.
* On balancing stress and recovery for the individual and organizations.
* On healthy oscillatory rhythms at all four levels of what the authors call the "performance pyramid": physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.
* On building capacity in these four domains with stress beyond our normal limits followed by adequate recovery.
* "Expanding capacity requires a willingness to endure short-term discomfort in the service of long-term reward.."
Chapter 4: Physical Energy: Fueling the Fire
48ff On how most of us involved in cognition work discount the role that physical energy plays in performance: physical energy remains a fundamental source of fuel here in cognitive work too. On your breathing as a powerful tool for self-regulation: focusing on being conscious of your breathing, expanding and extending exhalation; on breath awareness: breathing in to a count of three and out to a count of six to lower arousal and quiet the body and mind.
49ff On strategic eating: [the dietary advice here is more or less predictable for its era (the book came out in 2003): talking about healthy whole grains, eating five to six small meals a day, etc. Again, no discussion of fasting or autophagy, and of course skipping breakfast would be beyond the pale for these guys], but to give these guys credit they are also talking about avoiding high glycemic index foods here. I think the point to take away here is to be volitional with your eating rather than unmindful.] Also comments here on staying in a state of satisfaction rather than making yourself stuffed or hungry, staying away from the two extreme ends of the scale.
52 On drinking water as an undervalued source of physical energy renewal; on our thirst being a misleading and belated indicator of dehydration.
54 Interesting dietary application of the 80/20 rule here from the authors, suggesting to make sure 80% of what you eat fuels performance and health, but then you can eat whatever you want for the remaining 20% as long as you manage portion size.
55ff Discussion here on sleep deprivation and a bunch of "studies show science" studies on how bad sleep deprivation is; on the Libby Zion lawsuit against New York City Hospital suing, after a young woman died in the ER due to inadequate care from residents and interns operating on no sleep. On napping as a form of strategic recovery: note the nuance that the nap has to be timed for less than 30 to 40 minutes of sleep or the subjects would emerge groggy from being in a deeper sleep stage.
58ff Case study here on Jody R., a night owl with horrible sleep hygiene; the authors gave her a journal that she half-jokingly named it "Catharsis" to write down things weighing on her mind and things that she worried about, to get get them out of her head, onto paper, and then let them go for the night; she also added a reading ritual, to read nonfiction before bed, this would make her feel tired after 15 or 20 minutes, rather than reading a novel that would draw her in and keep her reading; at lights out she would consciously return her thoughts to events in her life that evoked positive relaxed feelings. Then also rituals upon waking up: moving her alarm clock away from her bed so she literally had to get up to turn it off; immediately turning on all the lights, putting on workout clothes and immediately taking a 15-minute walk outside at a brisk pace in natural light; then eating a light breakfast rather than not eating in the morning. [The reader can already see the generalized meta-takeaways here: you want to create and install a conscious, mindful set of sustainable rituals that make your activities (in this client's case, sleeping activities) volitional and manageable, rather than unmindful.]
61ff Case study of Bruce R., a workaholic: the authors had him add intraday rituals to take a break, like a 10:00am walk to the shoeshine parlor, at lunch 15 or 20 minutes of listening to classical music, and at 3:00pm a 10 minute yoga break. "It took him 4 weeks to lock in these new rituals so that they began to exert a noticeable pull on him." [Note the 30-day trial rule here: if you install a habit and maintain it for 30 days it will more or less become pretty much permanent.] The authors also had him curtail his weekend working hours from 6:00-8:00am Saturday morning only, thus he could get it off his plate for the rest of the weekend; followed by an 8:00-10:00pm. Sunday evening session to plan for the week ahead. [Often when you deliberately curtail your hours you get much more done both in absolute and per hour terms.]
64 Discussion of strength training and cardiovascular training; the authors recommend HIIT/interval training as well as strength training.
Chapter 5: Emotional Energy: Transforming Threat into Challenge
72ff "From our perspective, emotional intelligence is simply the capacity to manage emotions skillfully in the service of high positive energy and full engagement." Key competencies here are self-confidence, self-control (self-regulation), social skills (interpersonal effectiveness) and empathy, along with supportive competencies in patience, openness, trust and enjoyment. Note also the comments of the costs of negative emotions as they draw down our energy stores, and worse, they are "infectious" to others around us in our organizations.
73 Interesting comments here from one scientist, David Snowdon, based on results from a study he did: "I now make a conscious effort to regain my physiological balance quickly after an upset... My goal is to return my body to its normal, healthier state as soon as possible." [Note the hugely important meta-insight implicit here: that you are able to exercise agency over your internal mental state, and therefore your mental state does not have to be altered by external factors! This goes unsaid here in this example, but is worth repeating and reiterating that the volition originates with you.]
76ff On the idea of choosing activities for the sole reason of the pleasure and renewal they provide to you: comments here on the depth or quality of emotional renewal, depending on how absorbing, enriching or enlightening the activity is; television would be an anti-example here per the authors. See the example here of the high-powered attorney who replaced her relentless step machine and treadmill workouts with a dance class, and she also started taking a 45 minute break during the day to enjoy lunch with a novel in an arboretum.
81ff On relationships as a source of stress, renewal and recovery: examples given here of workaholic-type people who have superficial relationships with work friends but don't really have a life outside of work; with one client the authors have him install habits like joining an aerobics class or having dinner out with his daughter; also having lunch with each of his direct reports every Friday to get to know his work colleagues more deeply.
84ff On expanding emotional capacity, thought of as the same metaphor as strengthening your muscles: you can build your tolerance for emotional demands by pushing past your current comfort zone and then recovering. The authors talk about obstacles like insecurity or low self-esteem; a client example is given here of a woman who they encouraged to measure herself by the courage she demonstrated on sales calls, rather than measure herself by the response of the person [this is a GREAT example of identifying where your circle of control is, and then controlling that alone]. See another example of a client who the authors had "build his empathy muscles" by training him to begin interactions by listening rather than speaking, and then use reflection techniques to repeat what he heard from them; from there he built additional routines of small talk with employees in short time increments that he gradually increased over time. [Another takeaway: what exactly are the "muscles" involved in a given life domain, and then what habits can you install to strengthen them?] Finally, an example of an irritable, demanding boss who worked on his rituals of strengthening his muscles of patience and kindness, but inserting rituals like abdominal breathing when he feels irritated, and also transforming an experience of frustration into an opportunity to help others feel better.
92 Thought-provoking minor comment here about being fully engaged emotionally by celebrating what the stoic philosophers call "anacoluthia--the mutual entailment of the virtues" or the idea that no virtue is an island unto itself, but rather "all virtues are entailed. Honesty without compassion, for example, becomes cruelty."
Review:
* Key muscles fueling positive emotional energy are self-confidence, self-control, interpersonal effectiveness and empathy.
* Negative emotions are costly and energy-inefficient.
* Access to emotional muscles that serve performance depend on creating a balance between exercising them and seeking recovery.
* Emotional muscles such as patience, empathy and confidence can be strengthened just like muscles: pushing past our current limits followed by recovery.
Chapter 6: Mental Energy: Appropriate Focus and Realistic Optimism
94 On various cognitive/mental competencies like sustaining concentration, moving between broad and narrow perspectives, moving between internal and external focus; also on the ability to access realistic optimism, "a paradoxical notion that implies seeing the world as it is, but always working positively toward a desired outcome or solution. Anything that prompts appropriate focus and realistic optimism serves performance." On "supportive muscles" here which the authors describe as mental preparation, visualization, positive self-talk, effective time management, and creativity. Likewise these are capacities that come from a propoer balance between expending and recovering energy.
94-5 Also interesting comments here about how all the different physical, emotional and mental energy capacities feed on one another: thus poor sleep or poor fitness make it difficult to concentrate, and emotional feelings like anxiety or frustration interfere with focus and undermine optimism. Note the anecdote here from the boxer Ray "Boom Boom" Mancini, who says a single negative thought is what gets you hit in the face.
96ff On the large energy requirements of thinking; also a mention of Michael Gelb in his book How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci, asking "Where are you when you get your best ideas?" with common answers like "in the shower" or "walking in nature"; no one claims to get their best ideas at work! Also on Robert Sperry and his work on the hemispheres of the brain, explaining why our best ideas occur when we're not consciously seeking solutions. The authors reframe this as a form of "recovery" of the right brain from the analytical left brain, which is what we use most of the time at work.
98ff Example here of a client running an advertising firm who pushed himself very hard; the authors encouraged him to take up painting, a pastime he enjoyed as a source of recovery; it made him looser and more imaginative, gave him lots of ideas, etc.
101ff On the interconnection between body and mind, such that moderate physical exercise increases cognitive capacity by driving more blood and oxygen to the brain, as well as via production of brain derived neurotrophic factor which helps repair brain cells; different "studies show science" studies here cited to defend this idea. Comments here on stress and recovery for maximizing cognitive capacity, on how brain "disuse feeds on itself." Also on how adults tend to give up an inclination to continue learning because it's not as easy or effortless as it was when we were young; also on the idea that every time you learn something you build new connections in your brain.
103ff Another client here with a negative outlook on life: the authors have her journal every morning all the things she thought were going wrong or might go wrong in her life, and then step back and reframe each item as a challenge or opportunity rather than a catastrophe, and then focusing on gratitude and things that she felt thankful for. [The steps here are worth summarizing, they are a superpower: 1) put your anxieties on paper so they are articulated rather than vague and free-floating, 2) de-catastrophize them and reframe them into opportunities, and 3) practice gratitude.]
106 Good comment here on time management: "Time management, we tell our clients, is not an end in itself. Rather it serves the higher goal of effective energy management."
Review:
* Mental capacity is what we use to organize our lives and focus our attention.
* The mental energy that best serves full engagement is realistic optimism--seeing the world as it is, but always working positively towards the desired outcome or solution.
* The key supportive mental muscles include mental preparation, visualization, positive self-talk, effective time management and creativity.
* Physical exercise stimulates cognitive capacity.
* Maximum mental capacity is derived from a balance between expending and recovering mental energy.
* When we lack the mental muscles we need to perform at our best, we must systematically build capacity by pushing past our comfort zone and then recovering.
* Continuing to challenge the brain serves as a protection against age-related mental decline.
Chapter 7: Spiritual Energy: He Who Has a Why to Live
110ff The authors define "spiritual" in the sense of a connection to a deeply held set of values and a purpose beyond our self-interest. Examples here of Christopher Reeve after his accident, Cantor Fitzgerald employees after 9/11 decimated the firm.
112ff Interesting example here of a woman who never could quit smoking, but had much less difficulty quitting while she was pregnant because there was a deeper purpose: the health of her child; the authors further persuaded her that if she continued to smoke she would be sending a message to her children that smoking is acceptable and this would increase the odds that her children might grow up without a mother.
116ff Comments here on subordinating our own needs to something beyond our self-interest; on the irony that self-absorption ultimately drains your energy and impedes your performance; also quoting Nietzsche: "He who has a why to live for can bear with almost any how." Also quoting Victor Frankel "It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us."
118 Note the lamentable example given here with the now-radioactive Lance Armstrong; the authors published this book 9-10 years before the truth came out about him.
120ff An example of a conflict avoidant and indecisive client who the authors' told to ask himself a simple question [a metaquestion really]: "What do I really believe here?" to help him listen to his instinctive response; this would help ground him and avoid being distracted by other points of view; then a second metaquestion: "Who am I trying to please here?" [Both are incredibly useful questions to ask of ourselves--frequently!]
120ff An example of a conflict avoidant and indecisive client who the authors' told to ask himself a simple question [a metaquestion really]: "What do I really believe here?" to help him listen to his instinctive response; this would help ground him and avoid being distracted by other points of view; then a second metaquestion: "Who am I trying to please here?" [Both are incredibly useful questions to ask of ourselves--frequently!]
123ff Another example illustrating the authors' conception of integrity: with an executive who was considered unreliable and lacked follow-through, they gave her two key questions to ask herself: "Is this something I need to do myself?" And then if yes, to ask "When does it need to be finished, and can I reasonably get it done by then?"
124ff Along with integrity, honesty is the other fundamental spiritual muscle per the authors; the example here is of a financial advisor working with the authors to help correct his lack of truthfulness and his exaggerations, his moment of honesty came with the 2000 tech crash as he began "serving his clients" rather than "maximizing his earnings."
Review:
* Spiritual energy provides the force for action in all dimensions of our lives. It fuels passion, perseverance and commitment.
* Spiritual energy is derived from a connection to deeply held values and a purpose beyond our self-interest.
* Expanding spiritual capacity involves pushing past our comfort zone in precisely the same way that expanding physical capacity does.
* The energy of the human spirit can override even severe limitations of physical energy.
Part 2: The Training System
Chapter 8: Defining Purpose: The Rules of Engagement
Chapter 8: Defining Purpose: The Rules of Engagement
131ff Comments on purpose: "Purpose creates a destination." Comments on Joseph Campbell and his "hero's journey" concept: the call to adventure, the supreme ordeal, the mentor; the authors comment here that most of us feel too busy to search for meaning, and thus sleepwalk through our lives operating on automatic pilot. The authors' refer back to Roger B., describing how, when he was asked what gave his life meaning, only had platitudes to offer--he didn't feel passionate about anything.
133 The authors ask the reader to score from 1 to 10 on:
1) how excited you are to get to work in the morning,
2) how much you enjoy what you do for its own sake rather than what it gets for you, and
3) how accountable do you hold yourself to a deeply held set of values.
If you score below 22 you're most likely going through the motions.
135 On negative sources of purpose: those that are defensive or deficit-based, where you are responding to a threat (like your security survival are at stake), or responding to feelings of fear or anger; these are draining negative emotions.
137ff On intrinsic versus extrinsic motivation: intrinsic motivation is more sustainable; on the liability of chasing money and having money as a source of motivation. "Money may not buy happiness, but happiness may help you get rich." ["Chasing freedom from the plantation" is a much more positive and motivating way to frame reasons why we might work for economic rewards.]
139 A third form of purpose: that of renewing and rejuvenating ourselves, also serving something beyond ourselves rather than fulfilling our own needs.
141 Four more questions the authors ask that readers respond to in a period of uninterrupted time; the authors say that these will help surface your values and will help you to find your "rules of engagement" for whatever mission you're on. [These questions are excellent, really clarifying and focusing questions, and they are probably worth referring to every few months!]
1) Jump ahead to the end of your life. What are the three most important lessons you have learned and why are they so critical?
2) Think of someone who you deeply respect. Describe three qualities in this person that you most admire.
3) Who are you at your best?
4) What one-sentence inscription would you like to see on your tombstone that would capture who you really were in your life?
142ff On actually "behaving" the specific values that are important to you: for example, behaving generously; also on having a sort of congruency [although the authors don't use this word] between your actions and your values: see for example the executive who held "respect for others" as a primary value but then kept people waiting, disrespected their time, etc. [A value is utterly meaningless unless you perform it in the real world.]
145ff On creating a compelling vision statement for oneself: "a blueprint for action, and a buffer against the inclination to make energy choices reactively rather than reflectively." "A vision statement is a declaration of intent about how to invest one's energy. Regularly revisited, it serves as a source of sustaining direction and a fuel for action."
Chapter 9: Face the Truth: How Are You Managing Your Energy Now?
148 "Facing the truth about the gap between who we want to be and who we really are is never easy. Each of us has an infinite capacity for self-deception... Until we can clear away the smoke and mirrors and look honestly at ourselves, we have no starting point for change." [A good life-hack here is might be to simply assume you are deceiving yourself!]
148 Note this clever little poem from the psychiatrist R.D. Laing:
The range of what we think and do
Is limited by what we fail to notice
And because we fail to notice
That we fail to notice
There is little we can do
To change
Until we notice
How failing to notice
Shapes our thoughts and deeds
[The meta-skill here, then, is "noticing to what extent you are noticing things."]
149ff A discussion here of denial/denying reality: like holding a finger in the dike; denial also as a form of disengagement, making us defensive and constricted and cutting us off from the world [because we are not trafficking in reality, we are in delusion/self-deception.]
151ff The authors describe various other mechanisms as part of our "defense department": numbing out, intellectualizing, projection of your flaws onto others, imagining the worst in every situation, somatizing [converting unacknowledged anxiety and anger into physical symptoms]; see here the Woody Allen quote, "I don't get angry, I grow a tumor."
152 On the large distance between accepting the truth and then taking responsibility for changing that truth. "The truth may set you free, but it won't take you where you need to go." See also comments here from Carl Jung about "the shadow" that Jung uses to describe those aspects of ourselves that we split off because they violate our self-image. See also the Buddhist idea of learning to see things exactly as they are. [See here Krishnamurti's difficult-to-read but nevertheless valuable book The Beginnings of Learning.]
154-5 See the authors' list here of "expedient adaptations" and their discussion of each expedient's current benefits versus its long-term consequences: see for example working very long hours and having a poor work-life balance has the short-term benefits of "accomplishing more at work" and "less emotional risk" also it enables you to avoid responsibilities outside of work [!], but at the longer-term cost of a lack of time for intimate connection with family and friends, as well as incurring resentment from them, etc. Various interesting examples here, including alcohol and drug use, not exercising, a poor diet, a pessimistic attitude, multitasking, etc. I think most critical-thinking-capable readers can identify the pros and cons here, the short-term benefits vs long-term consequences of each of these with some careful thought.
156ff The authors have a fact-gathering questionnaire, having readers take 30 minutes to answer these questions on a scale of 1 to 10:
1) How fully engaged are you in your work? What is standing in your way?
2) How closely does your everyday behavior match your values and serve your mission? Where are the disconnects?
3) How fully are you embodying your values and vision for yourself at work? At home? In your community? Where are you falling short?
4) How effectively are the choices that you are making physically--your habits of nutrition, exercise, sleep and the balance of stress and recovery--serving your key values?
5) How consistent with your values is your emotional response in any given situation? Is it different at work than it is at home, and if so, how?
6) To what degree do you establish clear priorities and sustain attention to tasks? How consistent are those priorities with what you say is most important to you?
137 Then, five more open-ended questions:
1) How do your habits of sleeping, eating and exercising affect your available energy?
2) How much negative energy do you invest in defense spending--frustration, anger, fear, resentment, envy --as opposed to positive energy utilized in the service of growth and productivity?
3) How much energy do you invest in yourself, and how much in others, and how comfortable are you with that balance? How do those closest to you feel about the balance you've struck?
4) How much energy do you spend worrying about, feeling frustrated by and trying to influence events beyond your control?
5) Finally, how wisely and productively are you investing your energy?
[These two mini-questionnaires reminds me of the "21 questions to ask yourself annually" that Ernie Zelinski generously offers in his thought-provoking book How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free. This is the sort of thing worth reviewing every so often just to make sure you aren't leaving any big air pockets in any major life domain.]
158 See photo below the authors' list of typical performance barriers--or as they phrase it, "barriers to full engagement."
160ff Example here of an executive coach who had an aversion to being wrong or feeling criticized: "Facing the truth requires that we retain an ongoing openness to the possibility that we may not be seeing ourselves--or others--accurately."
162ff Note this interesting mental habit the authors suggest here: installing a subroutine of asking yourself "How might the opposite of what I'm thinking or feeling also be true? [This is a sort of form of "flipping it," inverting, flipping the problem around. "What is the bear case here if I believe the bull case?"] Also comments here on practicing self-awareness and practicing "facing the truth" as if is just like a muscle. "We fall asleep to aspects of ourselves each and every day." Also on using the serenity prayer to "recover" from truth-seeking and opening ourselves to unpleasant information about ourselves.
Review:
* Facing the truth frees up energy and is the second stage, after defining purpose, in becoming more fully engaged.
* Avoiding the truth consumes great effort and energy.
* At the most basic level, we deceive ourselves in order to protect our self-esteem.
* Some truths are too unbearable to be absorbed all at once. Emotions such as grief are best metabolized in waves.
* Truth without compassion is cruelty--to others and to ourselves.
* What we fail to acknowledge about ourselves we often continue to act out unconsciously.
* A common form of self-deception is assuming that our view represents the truth, when it is really just a lens through which we choose to view the world.
* Facing the truth requires that we retain an ongoing openness to the possibility that we may not be seeing ourselves--or others--accurately.
* It is both a danger and a delusion when we become too identified with any singular view of ourselves. We are all a blend of light and shadow, virtues and vices.
* Accepting our limitations reduces our defensiveness and increases the amount of positive energy available to us.
Chapter 10: Taking Action: The Power of Positive Rituals
165ff On Ivan Lendl's various rituals, both on the court and off; his training and diet; also the mental focus exercises that he practiced; also on how Lendl gave clear instructions to friends and family on what not to burden him with or not to distract him with (during, say, a tournament); also how he scheduled time for relaxation and recovery. "What Lendl understood brilliantly and instinctively was the power of positive rituals--precise, consciously acquired behaviors that become automatic in our lives, fueled by a deep sense of purpose."
166ff Returning [in very stark contrast from Ivan Lendl] to Roger B. again: on his various expedient choices like skipping breakfast to save time; drinking caffeinated coffee to artificially increase energy in the face of inadequate sleep; not exercising because he lacked discipline at the end of a long day and was drained by other demands; also using impatience and irritation to vent his frustrations without thinking about the toll that these negative emotions imposed on him and others; on his use of alcohol and cigarettes for immediate stress relief; also on him disengaging from his family as a way to conserve energy as well. Basically he was using survival habits here: the authors say that under more stress we're going to revert to those habits. [Just reading through the various "expedients" that Roger B. uses is in itself a great help. He gives the reader an easy cheat code to follow: just don't do these things; just do the opposite.]
168ff On how rituals save energy; rituals don't draw from our easily-depleted reservoir of energy like making decisions or using discipline or conscious will. "The sustaining power of rituals comes from the fact that they conserve energy." "Since will and discipline are far more limited and precious resources than most of us realize, they must be called upon very selectively... The sobering truth is that we have the capacity for very few conscious acts of self-control in a day."
170 On the idea of creating rituals of stress and recovery: returning to the idea of tennis players with their between-point rituals of 90 seconds or less; and then expanding the idea to to Wall Street traders applying the same idea in a career where they can hardly walk away from their screen more than a few minutes; also an example here of a writer under a severe deadline who switched his mentality from that of a marathoner to that of a sprinter, with periods of intense writing engagement and then short periods of recovery.
172ff Interesting thoughts here about how many have negative associations with rituals because they were imposed on us when we were young; those kinds of "imposed" rituals feel empty or oppressive; the authors are careful to contrast that from rituals that we consciously produce and install ourselves that help structure our lives and conserve energy. Also keeping our rituals productive rather than rigid and unvarying: you'll want to periodically revisit your ritual and change them when necessary.
173ff On key ritual behaviors: note the 30-day to 60 day acquisition period, examples of tweaks people made to various types of rituals to keep them grooved or to make sure that they were performed. Also on precision and specificity of a ritual: documenting it, writing it down, like when and where and the details of the ritual; also having a card or written reminder about the ritual somewhere that you will see frequently.
177ff Also insights on having the intention framed positively rather than negatively, this uses less willpower; also on structuring a change in manageable increments, using "serial rituals" as the authors phrase it.
179ff On the authors' process, which they call "basic training," for locking in new rituals during the 30 to 60 day acquisition period. They cite two critical behaviors:
1) "Chart the Course": this can mean writing in a journal in the morning or separating out a designated block of time to reflect on your personal vision for yourself, or a visualize the day or to figure out ways to connect to specific deeply held values.
2) "Chart the Progress": hold yourself accountable at the end of each day, "regularly facing the truth about the gap between your intention and your actual behavior"; keeping track of how effectively you are meeting the goal that you set, the authors suggest a daily accountability log, something that can be as simple as a yes or no check on a sheet kept by your bed. Also on setting up metrics and tracking them as both a source of information and protection against our capacity for self-deception.
Review:
* Rituals serve as tools through which we effectively manage energy in the service of whatever mission we are on.
* Rituals create a means by which to translate our values and priorities into action in all dimensions of our life.
* All great performers rely on positive rituals to manage their energy and regulate their behavior.
* The limitations of conscious will and discipline are rooted in the fact that every demand on our self-control draws on the same limited resource.
* We can offset our limited will and discipline by building rituals that become automatic as quickly as possible, fueled by our deepest values.
* The most important role of rituals is to ensure effective balance between energy expenditure and energy renewal in the service of full engagement.
* The more exacting the challenge and the greater the pressure, the more rigorous our rituals need to be.
* Precision and specificity are critical dimensions of building rituals during the thirty- to sixty-day acquisition period.
* Trying not to do something rapidly depletes our limited stores will and discipline.
* To make lasting change, we must build serial rituals, focusing on one significant change at a time.
Chapter 11: The Re-Engaged Life of Roger B.
183ff Returning to Roger B. [and some rather interesting commentary from the authors here] as they write that his initial motivation to change was so low it made him an "unusually challenging client." He didn't even send his pre-training materials in on time and he entered the program with a skeptical vibe. [One obvious takeaway here is never be like this. If you feel like you don't want to change, don't change. But don't just go through the motions like a pussy and be passive-aggressively "skeptical" about things. Either do it or don't. Think about how much easier your life would be, how much of an easier game setting you could set your life at, if you weren't ever a "challenging client" but rather a growth-oriented, open client.]
[One other thought about Roger B.: as the authors describe this client, the reader can see that he has quite a lot of unarticulated rage, he's frustrated in most of his life domains, and this manifests itself in impatience, quick anger and low frustration tolerance. Neo-feudal life is designed to put us in this sort of mental space: somehow you have to fight it, somehow you have to figure out a way to be a happy warrior--if anything just to show the system that it can't break you!]
186 Roger starts by sets up rituals to increase his physical capacity, not only for his health but also the fact that insufficient energy was driving all of his other problems. Within a day or two he's back to his old habits. He gets defeated right away, he's discouraged and brooding. And then he has a cathartic moment on his drive home from work, he arrives home and hugs his daughters, tears streaming down his face. His wife walks in and says, "Don't tell me. You've been fired." [Hmm. If I had to come home to a wife with this level of snark, who makes snotty comments like this right in front of my daughters while I'm hugging them, I'd probably feel awfully defeated too...]
189 Roger has cathartic experiences on the way home from work multiple days in a row; suddenly, as if by magic, he begins experiencing his family as a powerful source of renewal. [This part of Roger's story is less plausible, or perhaps a better way to say it is the average family isn't likely to see a rapid shift in family dynamics like Roger experiences here.]
189ff Roger then begins the metahabit of installing habits: he installs a subroutine of drawing comics for his daughters, leaving notes for them every morning; he installs a habit of oatmeal and a protein drink for breakfast along with uninterrupted time with his wife each morning. Then, after installing these rituals, he installs more: 15 minutes of meditating during this morning commute (to think through the day ahead and revisit his values); making a call during his commute home to somebody he cared about, etc. [I take away here the idea that the first few subroutines lead to more, and to more, and to more--but the first and most foundational subroutine is the idea of adding subroutines. You have to believe this is a thing, that you can do this thing, and that you can continue to do this thing ad infinitum.]
190 An interesting irony here: not one of the changes that Roger undertook during his two months with these coaches had anything to do with his job, but they bled over into his job and his work life benefited anyway. The authors say that his boss called and said, "I don't know how you did it, but the guy is reborn." Only later months later did he begin to install rituals specifically at work, it was a second phase of the action plan, and it included being more rigorous about his recovery breaks during the day, deferring email and voicemail responses until later in the day after he first addressed at least one important long-range challenge; and having lunch with one of his direct reports every week.
192 A notable point here about maintaining rituals when you travel or when you are out of your home environment: Roger struggle with his new routines/habits when he was on the road; he was less careful about his eating, working out, etc. Basically what he does here is "install the installing of travel rituals," including carrying healthy snacks with him, working out before client dinners, etc.
193 Also on Roger installing a conversational subroutine, the phrase "I understand, and I'd like to take a little time to digest this before I respond." He began using this subroutine instead of reacting what others would say to him at work.
194 Finally Roger himself is quoted here: "What amazes me most is that once my values became clear and I got the hang of building rituals, most of the changes I made weren't that hard. My life acquired a certain rhythm."
Resources
197ff Summary of the corporate athlete full engagement training system: [This is a mega review, going over the central insights of the book, starting with the foundational objective: "Build the necessary capacity to sustain high performance in the face of increasing demand."]
* Energy is the fundamental currency of high performance.
* Full Engagement: Optimal energy in the context of high performance. This means being: physically energized, emotionally connected, mentally focused, spiritually aligned.
* Full engagement is a consequence of the skillful management of energy in all dimensions.
* Managing energy, not time, is the key to high performance.
* We must learn to balance energy expenditure with intermittent energy renewal. To build capacity we must push beyond our normal limits training in the same way elite athletes do.
* Full engagement requires periodic strategic recovery. Comments here on oscillation between an optimal cycle of work and rest, avoiding chronic stress, and avoiding both overtraining and undertraining--both literally and metaphorically.
* On having the mentality of a sprinter, not a marathoner, and using interval or cyclical exercise instead of steady state exercise.
202 Note the interesting visual rendering of the entire edifice of the program here [see photo below]: on the foundation there are the supportive habits/skills ("small muscles") including sleep, exercise, diet, hydration, patience, openness, trust, visualization positive self-talk, mental preparation and spiritual habits (honesty, integrity, courage and persistence), which takes you to the second level of "big muscles" or primary capacities/skills: physical strength and endurance, emotional self-confidence and self-regulation, mental focus and realistic optimism, spiritual characteristics like your character and integrity. This then leads up one more level to energy management, and this leads to full engagement:
203ff Organizational Energy Dynamics: a list of bullet points here applying these concepts to organizations, using the metaphor of a corporate body as a reservoir of potential energy, with cells that need to be vital and healthy; on the corporate body as a living, breathing entity; on the idea that the principles of energy management apply organizationally just like they apply individually.
205 Ten "most important physical energy management strategies" [see photo]
208ff Finally, the authors offer a sample personal development plan Roger B., showing his entries into the authors' questionnaire; then there's blank version of the same personal development plan that the reader can fill in as well, asking for:
* My deepest values:
* My strengths:
* Jumping ahead to the end of your life, what are the three most important lessons you have learned and why are they so critical?
* Think of someone that you deeply respect. Describe the three qualities that you most admire in this person.
* Who are you at your best?
* What is the one sentence inscription you would like to see on your tombstone that captures who you really were in your life?
* Write your vision statement [in the present tense, it should be both practical and deeply inspirational]
* Write your work/career vision statement
220ff Here there's a worksheet of "my top work-related performance barriers" and their "energy performance consequences" followed by an action plan for the "targeted muscle" where the reader documents each installed "positive energy ritual" along with a "launch date" followed on the next page by a sample accountability log.
To Read:
***Look up the works of "the maverick psychiatrist" R.D. Laing, see for example The Divided Self; Wisdom, Madness and Folly; Self and Others; Sanity, Madness and the Family, etc.
Ernest Lawrence Rossi: The 20-Minute Break [it looks like some of this author's other books are worth checking out as well]
David Snowdon: Aging with Grace
James Prochaska: Changing for Good
Michael Gelb: How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci
Joanne Ciulla: The Working Life
Roberto Assagioli: The Act of Will
Roberto Assagioli: Transpersonal Development: The Dimension Beyond Psychosynthesis
Bill Walsh: Finding the Winning Edge
Jack Groppel: The Corporate Athlete
Robert Keegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey: How the Way We Talk Can Change the Way We Work
Connie Zweig and Jeremiah Abrams: Meeting the Shadow: The Hidden Power of the Dark Side of Human Nature
Connie Zweig and Jeremiah Abrams: Meeting the Shadow: The Hidden Power of the Dark Side of Human Nature